La musique est mon âme, il mène mes voyages

Notice!

2008-08-22T02:12:00.000-07:00

Ok so I just wanted to let everyone know that I did write but didnt have the computer later to upload pics. So I held out on posting everything. If youre catching up go back to August 4th and start from there. Also I added a new video of Buzios for you. Just a funny little one. It is really slow to upload so I cant do everything Id like. Im going to have to find a better why do upload everything. I think this link might work. Sorry that everything is a little pixcelated(?). Im not happy about it because the shadows make me look fat HAHAHAHAHA. Damn you computer and lack of seeing mu belly button, lol. Oh and that is Joanas sisters son from her dads first marraige. We were tired. Ok so that is all. Going to the beach in a few hours to hit the waves and I think Im going to see that new movie with Angelina Jolie in it. FUCK SHES HOT!! WOOHOO! Kisses....tchau!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=otgw-HoeFoE

The Big Hike!

2008-08-21T19:21:00.001-07:00

So earlier this past week Joana and I thought about going on a hike. Since we've been running a lot and most of the time it is uphill she thought Id love to see the view. Well she was right. We but on our bathing suits, some running shoes and drove about 20 minutes to the beach we go to on the weekends. Well the almost vertical mtn that I thought you couldnt go up has a trail. You walk up a small street in this cute neighborhood until you get to a small opening that you could easily miss. There are stone steps and a sign in Portuguese that says basicly: Please do not take what you shouldnt, please don leave anything that cant survive and enjoy the earth for what it is. Something like that. If was sweet. But after the stone steps is a vertical rock wall you have to press your body against to get up. I LOVED IT! Joana not so much. She made it to the first flat area then stopped to rest and tan. Me yah I had to to the most unsafe thing possible and crawl up to the top. But man the view was worth it. I could see all of Rio, Niteroi and the islands surrounding us in a 360 degree view. Below us I could watch the surfers play in the light blue splashing waves and the bodies frying on the golden white sand. It was amazingly beautiful. There was at one point three guys on the mtn but they just walked off the other side and I have no idea what happened to them...odd. But after I was done enjoying the wind and sun at the top I went back down to join Jo and get a little sun. Since we were alone the top had to come off because again I hate tan lines! HAHA. Joana didnt mind but she thought it would be fun to take pictures of my ass close up to make it look like a mtn with all the surrounding mtns. That and me alm ost naked, lol. She is too funny. She was trying to make one of the pictures look like a large catus was a penis, or how should I say it, making it look like I HAD a penis. She doesnt know but I already do. LOL. Why else would I wear the pants in my relationships? HAHAHA. Despite the tiny thong bikini I wont lie, its huge! HAHAHA. Ok ok enough with that. After tanning for a few hours, enjoying the quite and playing with the cutes little bug ever! Jo and I went back down and hit the sand. I got to play in the water for a few hours. Once Im in I never want to get out. I know to come in every so often so I dont just float on my back and drift off. *Yes it has happened before in Hawaii* I just love the water. It is nice here you can open your eyes and swim for days in the warm water. The waves are strong but you just have to hold your breath if you get sucked under and pray that you have the blessings of higher powers, lol. Not too bad of a day, the salt water is grat for the skin and really makes it soft like a micoscopic exfoliator in the water. Plus it dries the oil from your face so no break out here! WOOHOO! It was nice to wake up the next morning and be nothing but sexy sore which I enjoy entirly. Just had to share that story with you. Enjoy the pics!

Beach house in Buzios

2008-08-18T12:38:00.000-07:00

Man I had an amazingly long weekend!! But it was worth it. Gus came over Friday night and picked me up around 9PM and we took off in the middle of the night (the perfect time to drive) to Buzios. Gus had the perfect MP3 mix of 54 song including all the best live shows from Dononvan F, John Mayer, and more. I mean the best mix for driving ever.

So because its dark there wasnt much to see but we kept good company with amazing conversation and chocolate! LOL. Always the best driving food. When we got to the house it was in a gated community with (seaturtle) in the name. LOL. But Buzios has seaturtles EVERYWHERE!! LOL. It is great, I think they are so cute, come on Squirt from Finding Nemo just makes the movie! Duuuudddeeeee! But the house... OMFG. It was great. Opens up to a large living room with glass over looking the main strip of the town center and at night it was covered in lights. There are two bedrooms downstairs with three bunk beds in each room and a large bathroom. The kind where the toilet, shower and sinks are all in seperate rooms so people can all be in there at one time. Great kitchen and Gus packed some great fruits and gains to eat for breakfast. Upstairs (large wooden stairs) were two master bedrooms each with a bathroom. This place was too cute. So we set up for bed and then went out!

Out on the town in the center at midnight we walked around because the night life starts at midnight here. Again my kind of place! LOL. We went to an open bar and go crepes, his was cheese and mine was chocolate of coarse! LOL. Ate walked some more then went home and passed out. Now since it was 2am you would think Id sleep in but no lack of sleep even effects me at the amazing beach house with large bed and the awesome sound of wind rushing through the house. So I was up before 8 and headed out to the pool in the back yard where I just hung in the sun for a few hours. Did I mention everyone has a pool man?! Again with the topless thing and I damn near gave the pool man a heart attack. He kept saying he was sorry and I told him it was fine. LOL. The second time he came back he was more friendly and we had a nice conversation lol. When Gis got up he asked if I had eaten and I had just had a small piece of chocolate.... OK I DO THAT OK NOT ALL THE TIME B UT I DO AND IM NOT DEAD YET SO BACK OFF! I WANT CHOCOLATE IN THE MORNING!!! IT IS LIKE MORNING SEX SOMETIMES YOU ROLL OVER AND ITS THE FIRST THING ON YOUR MIND!!!!!!! So he was a doll and cut up fruit and covered it in honey and granola and brought it out to me with yogurt. Amazing, lol. After that we got ready to go to the beach.

We went to this place where there were real pirate ships in the water!!! I was stoked. The beach was small and I couldnt get out of the water. Swimming with the boats and near the rocks. Well the rocks not a good idea. Ive had practice swimming near the rocks in Hawaii and I know better but I really wanted to find all the cool stuff that grows on the rocks and when I was playing with it a wave came up and hit me from the back and tossed me higher on the rocks. Nothing crazy people!! Mom dont freak out! LOL. But I was lame and tried to stop myself instead of floating with it like I know how to do and now I have these FUCKING AMAZING SCRATCHES all over my right leg. I mean from my knee wrapping around to the middle of my butt. I dont mind the leg part but I really dont want my butt to scar. *Gus Im so glad you love my butt, lol, people liked it small but now its bigger from running and you still love it!!!! Im happy* Ok the scars would be pretty cool but really I hope it doesnt. I might be working with the photographer again at that Hotel to do a sweet bathroom tub thing or waking up and having breakfast thing. This place is amazing enough we might get some good shots.

After the beach Gus and I were spent..... OH I DIDNT MENTION JOANA AND CAMILA!! Well Camila couldnt come and Joana had a friend come in from Sao Paulo and wanted to stay and see him so it was just Gus and I. OK..... so we tool a nap and then got dressed to go out. Now I never wear this pink dress unless it is for a special occasion like spending the weekend in Vegas VIP and that photoshoot I did. But tonight I pulled out the dress and MAN I HAVE AN ASS! Ok Im trying not to be cocky really I dont want you to think so, but anyone who used to know me before I lost the weight I had an ass then I just had a cute little butt but now with uphill running I got my butt back and anyone who knows me knows how excited I get!! LOL, so this is me doing the *eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee* sound for my butt, hahahahahahahaha.

Gus and I went to this place to dance after having a few shots and going to that place to eat again. The place had good music and we got to be at the top in a section that was closed off (woohoo) and dance. Then there was this fat guy that had everyone cheering as he shook his body, lol. It was around 4AM when we left and when we got to the house we ended up blasting the music and dancing in the street together for another 45 minutes, lol. Gus can dance is all I can say, we had an amazing time.

The next moring I slept to 12 and then went out for an hour on the pool deck. When Gus got up we had breakfast then went shopping for a few things. All I needed was a shot glass, lol. I think Im at 100 now for my collection, lol. After all day doing the shopping and going to see some other beaches oh and doing some off roading we went to eat at this place that served Gus this HUGE and I mean the size of my face steak. He ate the whole thing and then said he was still hungry. LOL. We met a nice couple from Texas and talked with them for awhile then went home took our time getting ready and then left at 11PM back home. Getting home at 1AM I met with Joana and we talked for a good hour laughing about a few things. One of which was when we were laughing she turned her face into the pillow and got her braces caught on the pillow! I ALMOST PISSED MY PANTS LAUGHING SO HARD!! HAHAHAHA. It was great, no really really great.

So now Im catching up on work and emails and it is 5PM and still hot! MAN I love winter here, I think I love it here no matter what, lol. I have some videos that Im going to upload and I think one of them will be better then the butt video LOL! It is all fun and games right? LOL. So I miss everyone hope youre all well. Back to school you must go. Kisses.

Sushi and the Cable Car!!

2008-08-14T14:05:00.000-07:00

OMG! I cant tell you what kind of day I had yesterday! Im going to try but youll never really know how I felt.

So I was up late Tuesday night, just couldnt sleep still. Got a few hours before waking up and getting ready to meet Gus. Joana took me to the ferry and after thinking Gus lost me (but was late) we went driving around Rio and then to the Sugar Loaf or Cable Car. This thing has been around for 95 years and no accidents even though Gus said there had been just to freak me out.

Now the Cable Car is a two part tram like going up Heavenly or to the Matterhorn in Switzerland. You go up thousands of feet then get out and have a look around on the island mtn then get in another car and go up a few more thousand feet to where youre looking over the other half of Rio that you cant see from Jesus! Like Copacabana Beach and all. You get to the top and it is very windy until you get to the food court. Then you can sit and eat and look over the water and watch the little boats down below. At one point some kids in high school came up to me and asked if they could take a picture with me. I said yes thinking of the kids at Jesus and asked them why. They said because they wanted a pic with the girl in the SUPERMAN PANTIES!!!!! They KNEW WHO I WAS!!!! Seeing as those panties were stolen and I wasnt wearing them that day. What the hell is going on here????!

Gus and I get there and have a little adventure to the top and while we are there we meet my future wifey. Oh yes. Her name is Camela and she looks like Corrine Bailey Rae and guess what sounds just like her two! This girl can sing. Trained in Jazz and Gospel. She was born in Brazil but her dad lives in Canada so she got her citizenship when she was young and has been there doing the music thing for 17 years. I thought she was American when I fist met her. Her english is perfect. She was with her best friend Maria from Russia who married a Brazilian man and moved to Rio. But the best part about them both is that they are Wiccans and it was an instant connection between the three of us. Not to mention the energy with Gus there just made for a perfect friendship right away.

So we spent the rest of the day at a small place eating filet Minon and veggies and talking about life, engery, people, relationship, wicca, traveling and all. I mean we talked for hours and still I couldnt get enough so I invited her to Sushi with us and Gus was more then pleased to have her along. Maria didnt want to come because her husband was sick at home. On the way across the bridge we got to hear her sing and Gus and I were floored, no really if people knew about this girl she would be the next BIG thing. Im thinking of making it my goal to get her to the top since Im stealing her away back to CA with me. LOL. But no really we are going to get married in CA one day and I will have a Brazilian and Canadan citizenship and she will have one for the US then we will marry Gus for our ticket into Europe, HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. Man what an adventure that would be. We are already adding her in to our trip to Thailand and Europe too.

But this girl and all of us together just always feels so right. She was so happy to be with us and we had a great time just talking about everything. When we got to Joanas house we all met up for dinner at this sushi place. It was Jo, me, Gus, Camela, and Vitcor. 50 bucks for all you can eat but I swear it was worth it. Minus the fact they dont have anything with avo in it. SAD! But I will tell you this. I had 10 rolls to myself, a plate of cooked mushrooms the big ones, a bowl of soup, 6 oysters raw, and ice cream. I starved myself for two days before we went. I came home and couldnt move. I spend the rest of the night 'working' on my tummy and feeling like it was so worth it! I had weighed myself that morning and then again when I came home and I was a pound and a half heavier! HAHAHAHA! AMAZING!!!

So meeting Camela was the perfect thing. I really cant tell you how happy I was. A happy where it bubbles from the inside and comes out as laughter for me. Only a few people have seen this. If you have you can only imagine how it made both her and Gus laugh too. We were eating and talking in Portuguese and English, and I dont think any of us could stop smiling. So now we are addicted to each other and are all going to Buzios this weekend. We are staying with Gus in his other house on the beach and are going to spend the days in the sun and the nights shopping and dancing like fools! I cant wait. I really am so thankful for the happiness Ive found in my life and the people who I know Ive been desined to meet. This journey has only just begun!!!

Weekly Update!

2008-08-12T23:35:00.000-07:00

I guess I really cant think of what to say in this one. Maybe I can call it my weekly update or something cheesy like that. I guess it is because I didnt do much. After the shoot and traveling I was tired so I spent the next day sleeping and hanging out. Then the weather got really bad and it has been raining on and off for the last week. Ture I find that amazing and spend most of my time freaking my mom out by sitting in the rain and threating to get sick. But really it is something new. Sitting here and smelling everything differently then when it rains in Tahoe or LA or Hawaii or Europe or anywhere else Ive been where it rained. The sounds, if they are there or not. If people enjoy being out or not. What people cook when it rains and believe me it does change the mood for what you might be into that day. Try it and see.

So on the days where its clear enough I go running with Jo. We run up hill now and try to spice things up by walking into different towns and going through city tunnles and all. Just something to keep us from not hating running. I enjoy it but the muscles in my legs make my jeans tight, lol. And did I mention my butt is getting bigger. So Peter Maez you can give me that 5 bucks now! LOL. Its been 4 years and you still owe me! HAHAHA. I did go out one day and take a walk just to take pics with my camera. I read all about how to use it and can now use all the crazy settings and man I like to take pics that capture what I really see through my eyes. I got to meet some Germans on my walk, nice family with the son living in Sao Paulo for the last year.

Also the schools are back in and the new kids have to spend the first week getting money for a party at the end of the week where the older kids use the money to drink with, lol. Great fun. Liked egging the Freshman in high school. HEHEHE. So there are kids running around covered in body paint and begging for money, like bums in SF, but their body paint is dirt, lol.

Sunday was Fathers Day so we went shopping on Saturday for a gift. Took all day and we still couldnt find anything. Joana left and I hung with my mom finding things. And I did find a great army green shredded ball cap with patches on it and a great cologne at this store here. So now I have a scent that no one else can have! Yes it is a boys scent but I like it, and Im boyish so what? We found the dad a really sick bag for work and I found these punk rocker rockabilly 20s boots. Black and red plaid with gold lining (have to see em) I think Ill go back and get em. Ive never spent so much on shoes but these are worth it!!! (Nate Im going to do the rockabilly thing just for you because you and your friends begged me so nicely! LOL)

Then for Fathers Day we went to the Country Club (where I partied that one night) and had an amazing lunch. It was really great. I got to hang with the giant family again which is always nice. I love to be around families even if they arent my own. The weather wasnt so great so we spent the night in watching movies and just having a good time being together.

Then Joana and I wanted to go out so we grabbed her EX boyfriend (dun dun dun) and her older brother and went to this place that was pretty cool. 20 to get in but 10 in drinks. So I got something strong because one drink was like 6 bucks, lol. I ended up having a really cool drink with fruit in it and some how ended up dancing with Junior (the older brother, 27) who is a very good dance (American like) and next thing I know he is licking my teeth. Yep which led to mt next buzzed make out. I have rules people, big rules but that night I wanted to have fun and right in the middle of dancing it was raining and we were outside. So hot techno music and all of us in little outfits getting sexy soaked in the rain was worth it even if it was a family member and now when we see each other we just state then smile and walk away. I couldnt stop laughing all night. The rain on my face and getting me wet so then my hair was curly all over again was the best. He was spinning me around and picking me up. It was a blast.

Joana and I took a trip the next morning to Nanas house where she stuffed us with friend food and the most amazing home made jam ever! I mean it is made with the fruit that you cant get anywhere else. This is the same lady that makes the desserts. Well she makes bread and jam too! It was the best. Ruined the running for the rest of the day because I was so full and I really do try to watch what I eat... lol.

So that was mostly my week thus far. I have a big weekend planned in Buzios again with Gus, who Im falling on love with all the time!! LOL. Oh and Sushi and the Cable Car on Wednesday!!!

Photoshoot and Buzios

2008-08-04T16:14:00.000-07:00

(First I want to mention that I uploaded pics into my last blog. Not all but a few.)

**** Also I want to know who the hell is watching my ass all the time??!!! My Brazilian beach video has over 1000 plays. It was at 831 on Wednesday, 950 on Friday morning, 1000 Saturday night, and it is has been one week and is now at 1,164 plays!!! Come on really now? It was just a joke video, lol. But I love you guys really, so enjoy it I guess!!! ****

I wanted to mention because I forgot last time that I did see Batman and Handcock and both were fucking insane! I was dying the whole time. Kinda like when Fast and the Furious 3 came out, or Dukes of Hazzard. Hot girls, hot cars, hot action. I was yelling a lot. Batman with that scene with the motorcycle up against the wall was SIIIICCCCKKKK! LOL. Oh and Will Smith, hotness. Crush on him since Fresh Prince...

Well as it turns out the weather did get pretty shitty for the shoot. But we left anyway at 8:45 am in a rental car to Arraial do Cabo. We stopped on the way at a small place where I go hot tea while the boys ate. It was so cute. Outside was a petting farm with baby animals running around! You could fish and take home what you caught and it was just a nice place to spend while we were all waking up a little more. Then we were on our way again. We stopped at a large beach where the homes were amazingly rich. Like driving through Hollywood until you hit Beverly Hills and you know you found the rich people. But the best part.... the beach was MADE of seashells!!! The sand wasnt even there, it was all seashells! Small, fat, large, round, spiral, etc. I filled my small purse with seashells and now have a small bucket on my table lol. Too funny. After we left the beach we went on a back road up this giant hill to see this 5 star sea food place. But I didnt know it had burned down! So when I saw the view (you could see Rio and all the way around to the next largest mtns!) and the building burnt to the ground I was floored. It was amazing. Again I wish that Phil was with me. We would have had an amazing time doing crazy shoots in the half burn kitched where the walls were licked by flames leaving black marks on the walls. Where the lovers came and signed their names with the charrcol. Where the stone frames stood strong while pillar of wood where burnt like getting hit by lightening all the way up. Pieces of brown, blue, green, clear broken glass was everywhere! The once beautiful tile flooring was crushed from the weight of the roofs falling on them. I happen to find a great piece with the Brazil logo still on it. I didnt want to leave. But the only reason we didnt shoot there is because it was dangerous. One road to go in and out always calls for trouble in Brazil. You get there and get stuck with a gun to your head. So we left and drove another hour to the beach area where we were going to shoot.

When we got there I happen to see a section of the beach covered in 15+ foot high white (and I mean white) sand dunes and asked if we could shoot there. So we did. So with a white dress, white shirt and pants, and a white little thong we went out to shoot some cool stuff. But since it was so fucking windy we couldnt use the reflector so I had to endure the sun in my eyes and since it was on a sand dune I had to spend every three minutes closing my eyes and mouth so I wouldnt have sand in it. Its been two days and Im still finding sand everywhere! But we did get some great shots of me in this dress (the one I bought so my mom would be happy) which was perfect against dark skin tone and pure white sand with blue ocean in the background and the rain clouds in the distance. Then I tried a white Indian style top and then down to a white thong. By that time I was covered in sand and my hair was curly from the humidity. We had all eated about a tablespoon of sand and then decided to leave.

We drove around and looked at some beaches and even got out and walked aroun d a little bit.And while we were guess what I saw? A FUCKING PENGUIN!! Yah, every year they get more and more that get lost at sea and follow the fish to the beach, where the wanter was actualy cold, ug. That was too cool!

Then we went to this great place for lunch were I got pasta and some rice dish, since I didnt really have more then coffee that morning. Remember that the people Im with were French and Brazilian (his assistant). So the languages we were speaking were too funny. Then I started saying funny things in German and Hawaiian and we couldnt stop laughing. Just funny words we knew in odd languages. It was a blast.

Since the weather got worse as the day went on we went to Buzios anyway but just to look around for a few hours. But believe me when we got to the view points I didnt want to go home. I mean AMAZING! Then we walked around the town center and ran into some French people that own this wonderful hotel in Rio where the rooms range from 250 to 650 per NIGHT! But it is worth it. Xaiver said the rooms were amazing and I said that we would have to do a photoshoot there! So hoping for that! WOOHOO! But all around it was a nice day. I slept on the two hour ride home and yah, stay tuned for pics!!! WOOHOO!

Jesus or Gus?

2008-08-02T08:37:00.000-07:00

If you're just tuning in after awhile I would head back to my last post in July for an update on my absense. If you got that then head back to my first post in August for the update and go from there. LOL. Since Im posting three posts in one day...

OK! I FINALLY SAW JESUS! And just so you know I didnt cry. I thought Id be so full of emotion that I would cry when I saw how amazing he was and how amazing seeing Brazil from the tallest mtn would make me eel so small in life and make me cry. But no. I took it like a man (always :)) and enjoyed the day.

It started off with Joana and I getting a late start on meeting Gus, who I feel might be my traveling soul mate. The man I spend my life with. Too bad we both feel marriage is for people after 35 and Im not into guys. But that doesnt stop me from loving him or planning our trip to Aussie or Thailand (WHICH IM EXCITED FOR!!!)We have thought about getting married, but again only after we're 35, lol. Now Gus is smart and so much like me I cant even tell you. We fill each other with life. We walk into a room together and Joana says everyone starts smiling. We put of happy rays that bounce off everything and we can never stop smiling. Did I mention he is horribly sexy in everyway and makes me feel like the most amazing women alive? Well he does. Everything I do or say or anything he loves and I feel the same way about him. He feels the same way I do about life. That traveling is number one. He understands sex is more then sex. That everyone is beautiful in one way or another. And he FEELS ENERGY just like me. I really fell for him and miss him when I dont see him. I think Im like on E when we are together. Amazingly happy at all points of time then when hes gone I have the come down where Ive used all my happy vibes and now Im left with just a calm and peaceful place where I smile at all times. So point blank I love him and might grow to be IN love with him.

So we met Gus in Rio at his place. Now he showed us his apartment but I kept wondering why he had amazing spiral starecases that didnt go anywhere. Well next thing I know he said he was showing me MY room. That when it was done I would live there with him. He takes us up a back door and one floor up. Im thinking it is the roof but no it is the PENTHOUSE SUITE of this amazing building. He bought it at 25 and it looks over all of Rio. It is under construction but the room is huge and the outside porch is even bigger. I couldnt breathe we were so high up and it was just amazing. I love this guy. He saves his money at really great jobs in California then comes home and since the dollar is better he puts it all in stocks and makes more money. He is just too smart.
After showing us the place we went to the train to go up the mtn to see Jesus. And who do I bump into? Oh yes a famous Berlin DJ named BEN! He was so out of place with his sexy lite sweater and thin scarf but I loved it because it was so German sexy meets classic punk London. We hit it off and everything. He was with the Paris Hilton of Brazil. The daughter of a million dollar business or something, with her body guard who took to watching over me while we were there, lol. We got on that rain and OMG the hottest all girl South African basketball team was on it. They were more then will to take pictures with me and some of them hit on me and they say once you go black you never go back! But my first boyfriend was black... I wonder what happened to him....? Well anyway a lot of them were pretty hot and Joana couldnt help but laugh at how they kept me in a tight little circle while they taked to me. Touching my arms and always making sure I had their attention. It was as if theyd never seen a white american girl before.... maybe they havent, lol.
But we spent like 3 hours taking pictures. First in the sun, then the sunset, then with all the night lights of the city. Then we got CRAZY! Joana and I never spot laughing and Gus and I live off each other. We just understand that being Superman and a totumpole makes for better pictures. Yes we got the nice happy shots and Gus and I took a few of us kissing in a sunset because it was too perfect and Joana wouldnt kiss me, lol. Not that I asked or anything. She ended up kissing Gus for pictures instead HAHAHA. He has such a small and perfectly soft mouth. I think he would be the man to make love to. That because he understands it isnt all about sex that he would be the man to really please a woman. But no really we had an amzing time and it was spectacular view. I mean holy shit!!!
Then Gus took us to dinner at a salad bar like the DRESSING ROOM in LA but more fancy. But the same fill in the blank card and turn it in thing. But ours came with ceeshes and fruit. But I love the Dressing Room. I will go there again I will. Great now Im craving there honey mustard dressing... ug.... Im going to have banana cake instead. Then even as full as we all were we crammed ice cream down and ended the night. Joana and I laughing all the way home.
The next day I stayed at home to rst. I had been running twice and then climbing the mtn my legs were hurting a little. I pushed myself too much. So I just did upper body that day, and went tanning (I think the AC guy saw me while he was on the roof, love it!) The I got ahold of Xaiver my photographer from France. And the next day we met for lunch to go over what we will be doing. I had to move the time back because Joana went to a party at her work and said shed be home late, late was 6 AM!!! LOL. But the beach shoot will be amazing. He is an amazing guy that works for a very big company and I think makes a lot of money since he is renting me a car and spending the day taking me around with his assistant Carlos before we start the shoot. Then we will be renting a boat and going to an island to shoot there too. Oh and did I mentio it is at Arraial do Cabo one of the most amazing beaches in Brazil about two hours from where I live? No really look up pictures on google and see for yourself. Now me are supposted to be doing it tomorrow but they are saying as of two hours ago that we are getting wind changes in and should be getting rain tonight and tomorrow. But Im up for sexy shots in the rain any day. If not we will move it to later i the week but I will try to post them ASAP! Im excited. Joana and I are planning a trip to Soa Paulo which is 4 hours away but I have two photographers that want to work with me there, the other two might come to Rio. Im hoping these work out. One of the photographers works for a mag here and needs project models. That would be sick!
So Im working and not just playing all the time guys! GOSH! LOL. Plus teaching English is not to shabby a job either I love it!
So Im home pampering with Joana, doing nails, toes, hair and eating banana and chocolate cake. LOL. The weather is getting sexy cloudy with warm breezes and sweet smelling air floating through the house. GOSH! I LOVE MY LIFE!!!
So I will update everyone when I put pictures up on my last blogs and all. Wish me luck for tomorrow! Oh and Im glad everyone likes the rockstar shots! The bass and fishnets pull the look together.... I might do another one of those because guess what? Tattoos are VERY VERY VERY cheap (and safe) over here, hint hint....! LOVE!

Eu entendo....

2008-08-02T07:55:00.000-07:00

Ok Im back. I think maybe the first letter got a little long but I was making up in short for almost three weeks of missing out on tell you guys everything. I hate not being able to go into detail, I really do. Colors, sounds, smells, that are so different I really wish I could sit back and write for hours about everything. Like yesterday morning where I woke up smiling for no reason and had a nice cup of coffee while I sat on the roof ledge and talked with the lady purning her bushes on the next roof over. She was listening to something like Billie Holiday but in portuguese. The sun was a warm ray just over our heads around 10 am and every where smelt like breakfast. But this is something I normally wake up to. Or just sit around all night waiting for. LOL.

But I had finally gotten ahold of my Gus. The Brazilian guy I met in Tahoe and I know it sounds weird but our souls touched. There was that energy I talk about in most of my blogs. More so the blogs on myspace if you need to refer back to what I mean about when I meet people and how we carry that person in us through time. I will tell you about Gus and our adventure later but first I needed a topic to bring up to move on into what I really need to write about...

Over here they have a religion that I like. These people believe in past lives. But in a way that makes you understand why life miht have a reason outside of god. That you keep having new lives to go through things that you need to learn. Maybe in one life you have an enemy and you never get a long. Then you die. You are then both brought back into life maybe as sisters and you have to learn to love each other. Sometimes it doesnt happen and you go through another life with that person again. I think this is something I might be going through with my sister, lol. But really. They think you have to learn from heartbreak. That everything happens because it is fate and it cant be changed because you NEED to learn. You need these things until your soul is so pure you can go to Heaven. That you have the right to be in the place of god. I look back and I understand what they mean. I see that through my heartbreaks I have become happier more so happier now then ever. I see my life has a reason that I keep reaching for and some things come eaiser then others. I have always known that something keeps me going. A need to meet new people and to travel. A need to fall in love and give my heart over only to have it broken and mend again to be stronger for the next time. Maybe this lfetime Im not destined to meet my true love and you know the more I think about it, the more it is ok with me. The more I see maybe this round I have something more important out there for me. Like learning strength or wisdome of travel. Maybe I have to be a rock for someone or be a smile that makes a day better. A laugh that carries on the wind for children to hear on the playgrounds in which they play letting their imagine take flight. Maybe I have a burden I must carry or an obligation I must fulfill. Just maybe life is bigger then this one all together and Im meant to just be and trust in fate and let it guide me to be an ever better person. Or just maybe my travels will bring me to a new place where he or she waits for me like I wait for them. Where happiness is made for this lifetime and not the next. What have I learned in my past already? What qualities have come easy for me this time around? Patience, understanding, love for all no matter what, openness, giving, trust, and thank god that energy Ive been blessed with feeling. I understand the good and the bad before I even touch a person. I have the gift of dreams that show my future. Not like deja vu, but dreams where I really see what happens in my life. I dreampt about people I would meet later on in life that I have. I drempt about the lovers I would take, I drempt about the places I would go and the feelings I would have. I have even been walking around in my dreams since Ive been here. I always believed that if I was living my dreams it meant I was going in the right direction. And since Im doing that now (but wasnt for a long time) I am so excited to see what comes next, my dreams are getting better and better!!! But again maybe I was able to pick up these things in other lives and maybe Im that much closer to who I really need to be. Im hoping that this makes sense to some of you....

Joana told me when she hear about this religion from her friend she wanted to see it for herself. So her friend took her to this place in which they "practice" and was introduced to a Medium (the people who see things and spirits like the tv show...) who sat her down and told her not to be afraid, because she was. Then went on to say all of these things that had so much meaning for her in her life. Things the first would never know and never tell a strange person to make them look real. Then she said as she was leaving that she knew she thought about her dad a lot and Joanas dad was ok and happy in a good place. Take in mind Joana's dad dies when she was two...

I know most people dont approve of these things or believe in them, but really I think there are people who can reach in you and feel something deep down that no one else can. Like when I feel the energy from your body and understand your health. I know when youre lacking something in your diet. Dont ask me how but I do and thanks to the pregnant girls at the Powder House I have freaked them out but also given them better doctor reports LOL! Jenn and Vanessa love to your babies! Miss you guys!!

So I just had to put this out there. I had to bring up something that made me feel like my life has a meaning outside of everything else. That when I can open my eyes and smile and say life is good and move on from every moment that brought me down, when I can take it out of my life as a lesson learned and toss it in the trash and put my feet on solid ground I know there is more for me. Maybe this is the reason why school has been so hard for me to go back to. Something that just says WASTE OF TIME to me because I only love something for so long then move on. Maybe I am destined to travel and live life to learn, to see, to believe in many things. Maybe after die and come back ready for the knowledge learned in a school and not through life travels. But whatever the case I am happier then Ive ever been in a long time. Im happy knowing my life is being lived! Really lived! That not only am I thankful for every sunny day but every cloudy day as well. For the smells and sounds, the feelings and being touched. For life and all its wondnders. Im thankful, so very thankful. Im thankful for what happened to me as a kid and recently because it got me here. It got me meeting people I never would have or going places i never would have gone. Im the person people tell me they fall in love with before I change. Im that girl again and if I fall in love again, either as a lesson or for good, I will always be me. But now I will be older and wiser. I will be the one that pushes for them AND myself. I will be the one to make someone happy by being me and the same for the other person. So thank you to my friends for getting me here and loving me as me, thank you to my family for understanding and giving me so much as hard as it is to except my life, and thank you to my lovers and heart breakers because of you I will be the person someone wants, I will be better, I will be the person Ive always been and never change for anyone in this life or the next. So again Im thankful and I want everyone to know that even if I met you for a second I think it was going to happen and you did something for me to change my life and I dont judge if was for good or bad because now I understand it is all about learning. It is all about what life gives you and how strong you are to handle it. It is just about what is to come and not what has happened. Thank you....

Im breaking this shit down!

2008-08-01T15:44:00.000-07:00

Ok ok ok I know Ive been bad but again it was because of the computer breaking. And now I still cant upload pics so I will have to do that later and leave a note saying I did so you guys can check back on some sick ass pictures. (Which I did on 8/4/08)

So after I wrote my last blog the family came that weekend. The family from Macoco. Yah I guess someone has cancer and they were in Rio checking in, sad. But not sad enough that I woke up that morning to white wine and cheese for BREAKFAST!! AMAZING! My kind of people. We spent the whole three days drinking great wines and beer and eating lots of home cooked meals. And did I mention the nana bakes as a hobby, that soon turned into a job that turned into a business? And OMG I ATE A SHITLOAD OF SWEETS! My mouth is still craving more. I had no idea that the desserts at the engagement party were all home made by her! So yes Im hoping she comes back soon. Its been two weeks and Im still praying, me and my tastebuds! HAHAHA.
Oh yah and I got to see my George Clooney but there was no kissing the hot, 50 year old, ex pro soccer player, this time. But we did have an amazing time going out with Joana, Francisco, and Rafael. AND I FINALLY GOT MY ICECREAM! I had been waiting since I got here to have some, and you have no idea.....it was amazingly worth it! I also got to see the Nokia Phone Car with its own headset blasting music at the bar we were drinking at! HAHAHA. That pic is so cool. Little black car with a headset on. And the Nokia people had sick headsets on and were walking around letting people listen to the newest music out.
But the family left and before they did I got some great shots of all of them together (yes about 6 were missing, they left during my nap). Ill print them up later and frame them as gifts. What a great and kind family Ive been blessed to know. I really cant explain how generous they are. The bride and groom still want me to come for the real wedding. LOL. It might be in a year or so, so who knows where Ill be then. I got an offer to go to Europe next summer if everything works out well. Or I can travel with the new man in my life, Gus. Ill get into that later...
Later that week I got to meet Victor's girlfriend and I must say..... um..... yah! Brazil's next top model here. I still have no idea how he got a girl like her. I know he is sweet and all but really, shes the movie star that marries the boy next door kinda thing. Too cute!
Take in mind that Joana and I were STILL getting over this cold and I was too the point of not sleeping again. Two hours here and there after going 24-48 hours up. And Im still doing it. I just cant stop for a second I keep thinking Im going to miss something. And it is a good idea that I did. Because the night that the family left was almost a full moon. So I spent the day watching the moon get bigger and bigger then all night laying on the roof watching the moon and in a warm breeze with my iPod playing Frank, Billie Holiday, Jack Johnson, Donavon F, and 311. Perfect for me. Then seeing the sun come up with a full moon still in the sky killed me. I cant tell you what it looks like to see a pink sky and a still white glowing moon at the same time. I took pics but they will never capture the brillance of it.
Then at one point (seeing as it has been so long and Im going off of the pics in my camera to remember all the things I've done) Joana and I went to the American Consulate. She needed to get her Visa to go to Boston in December but will be back to join us for Xmas! She is too excited!! It came in the mail yesterday and she bought her ticket a few hours ago and hasnt stopped jumping and screaming everywhere! HAHAHA.
Ive taken up running. I HATE RUNNING outside, that is because I never had an amazing beach to run on! So everyday I run 6 miles and on the weekends I do a 10 mile walk then run back, a half and half thing. LOL. Finish with a nice ab session and 4 sets of 25 push ups. I cant help it I have to keep the body going. But hearing Joanas friends tell me I look strong and it is very American is worth it. They always think it is ok to go out with me because Id kill anyone that messes with us. Yes Zane where ever you are with your crazy ass girlfriend thank you and your dad for that. Ive had to kick a few asses and it was worth learning how. Soooo. I run on this beach in Sao Francisco, yes like San Francisco, lol but Ive never been able to go enjoy the beach a few blocks from my house. So I went and took another one of my day long walks (which I do a lot, too much to see) and headed to Icanpa. I was able to meet with a fisherman and he caught a

flying fish and a water cobra for me to see. THE FLYING FISH REALLY HAS WINGS!! Bright blue spotted ones! It was too cool. I played in the sand and poked at all the fun things to poke at, making little "eeeeeeeeeees" to myself. LOL. I know a few people that can see me doing that very well. But I love the water and do everything I can to enjoy it here.
Tanning not so much. The girls like to tan a lot. But they LOVE (and I mean it is the sexiest thing here) TAN LINES! Yuck. I hate them. The "ones" that have seen me naked and approved of this non tan lined body... thank you. Because the darker you are with tan lines the better. They love to wear dresses without the straps to show off the tan lines even. And men find the sexiest porn videos to be the ones with the girls that have the tan lines... living with a 27 year old single man and a horney 15year old I know these things. LOL. But anyway, yuck to the tan lines, I just go to the back of the house where the soccer field is (yes a field) and tan naked back there HAHA. But shhhh dont tell! No really dont because then I might have to worry about the boys finding out... or the pool man, but I think he already knows... *wink*
I was able to spend a walk getting ice cream at a store I found down the street and buying a birthday card for the dad. I wrote in english and in portuguses and he loved it! We went to dinner down the street with a small part of the family and man can that man eat. When everyone was done he just ordered a new plate all to himself and ate everything!! HAHAHA! Love it. We ended with a strawberry and cream cake, very nice!
Joana and I have been shopping a few times but again the style here is so different from anything Id ever wear but it is grown on me. Enough that Im almost thinking of buying stuff just because I think that it will be in the states 6 months from now and I can can say I wore it before it was cool (like in 6th grade where my mom put me in peddle pushers and then the whole school was in them thank you very much! HAHAHA).
No the reason we are at the mall so much is because Joana and I have been trying to see Batman forever. Yes everything comes out here at the same time. And everytime there is so big of a line we have to change our plans. So after thinking we would see a 3 o clock show we ended up missing it and spending time at the mall. At one store a girl found out I was american and freaked out. Saying over and over how much she LOVED english. She had to tell me all the time. Even making little hearts with her fingers when she said the word love. HAHA. Then she found out I speak french and she told me her friend LOVES french as much as she LOVES english. So she asked if I would talk to her. I said for sure! Well she introduced me to this drop dead hot blond who got very close, too close that I think I went fuzzy for a second off her amazing perfum. So what did I do... and Im so bad.... I grab one of her jean belt loops and started saying every dirty, little thing I new in french to her. I know Im so bad. She just turned pink and smiled. I have a feeling that maybe she knew a few words and put two and two together. I got a huge smack on my arm from Joana when we left because she knew what I had done. Even though I was red for two days after I think if she hadnt slapped me I would have been in fuzzyland the rest of the night... lol.
Or not because then I headed home to get ready for Victor's girlfriend's 15th birthday. Where since her family is LOADED and it is like a Mexican 15th (quinsenaira?) it was huge. They pulled me in and dragged me to a bunch of girls who were all talking with me and just wanting me to talk to them in english. They practice in school like we do for spanish classes (which they also have...odd) Victor told me later that they thought I was cool.... glad 15 year olds think I rock, its all about the baby steps right?! LOL I crack myself up. They put lights on me and a tie and feathers and put drinks in my hands all night. The food AMAZING as always and I ate like three plates and dessert.... was full for three days after. I have some great photos. Met a sick kid from here but he lives in FL with his dad all year and takes portuguese as his second language! We were dancing and fooling around all night just us, laughing at all the crazy Brazilians. He even made me play with the DJ. What is it with DJ's over here?! I think because they are all men when they meet a girl that can spin (even a little like me) they want to hear it. Whatever. I learn more and more everytime!! Oh I have to mention the cake was covered in STARS! It was silver with midnightblue stars. Can someone say um, the best cake ever?!! Ok so that is it for that party... LOL
A few days later Joana had some remodeling done on her HUGE closet and had to go through everything. Well everything she didnt fit into ended up in my dresser. I mean things with tags still on them. And to my surprise she only likes brand name things, so I think I have over 2000 bucks in new clothes. SHIT SON! She rocks! But everything that I didnt like I tossed into a bag. A bag that later Victor found and had to try everyhting on! He is maybe 5 feet 9 inches and 185 pounds putting on every little shirt and dress possible! And thanks to me teaching him the song

before it came out running around singing "I Kissed A Girl" very badly....
I went to work with mom to her law firm and was able to learn a bunch then after walk around and shop for cheap gifts. Since they have everything we have it is hard to find gifts that really mean something. I did find a music store like guitar center but is was mostly drum sets. Im not expert but I think a few of them were pretty nice. Ill have to ask someone later about it.
So there have been a lot more things that Ive done, going out wise. But nothing new. Dancing, pretty girls, friends, pretty girls, food, food, food, all the good stuff! Ok well much love to everyone and yes Im behaving, a little....

So sorry!!!

2008-07-29T14:26:00.000-07:00

Hey everyone!!! Sorry its been awhile but my computer broke two days after my last blog and sadly I couldn't get it fixed here. The warranty only works in the US. Fucking laptop... I miss my beautiful iMac at home. I know they're amazing and mine just waits for me to one day come home and play with it. I know I'm a bad mom hehehe!!! So right now I'm writing a small letter from my pretty little iPhone which gets really annoying after awhile LOL. For those of you who know even the auto spell doesn't fix everything!!! So as soon as I get to a comp where I can write freely and upload pics I will be updating you. But don't worry I've been busy as always!! Love you all miss you more.

Ps: no this does not mean I'm taking calls. Please don't call or text FYI!!! LOL and yes I know I'm a Mac girl but they're better what can I say!?

Oh, I've been busy....

2008-07-13T19:37:00.000-07:00

I have to put this out there now. I love my life. I love the people in it and the amazing things that have happened thus far. I'm thankful for my family and the understanding we have come to. That they can't take me from the life I want to live. That my life needs to be full of life experiences, that my feet never keep still and I just have to keep moving forward. One day I might do what they want, but for now I'm pleased to be surviving by myself. That I made my own money and lived on my own and chose to come to Brazil. Not knowing anything about it really. Only that it was new and something I needed to do. I've kept myself from traveling for too long. Now I've been offered a chance to stay for a year as an English teacher!!! I can't think of what that would do for my life. True I planned on going from here to Thailand or Austrailla but now I'm not sure. My life is an open book that I just keep writing in. I had writer's block for some time now and then poof, the book can't hold all the chapters I'm making for myself. So there I said it. Moving on.

I've been sick. Oh yes a little cold moslt in my head and a little scratch in my throat but that is it. And the need to sleep all day long. But then be up all night still. LOL. I get to see the sunset and sunrise everyday. Nothing better then that. I can sit at my computer and work and out the window past the pool in my backyard I can see the buildings light up as the sun travels up them in the morning and then down them at night, bouncing off the windows and lighting up the streets at dusk still. So I haven't been on to write about what has been going on for the last two weeks. I started this blog on the 13th but I am only now getting back to it on the 17th. Hell I might have to come back to it again since the family is here from Macoco with the baby! I love it! I showed her the guitar and she went nuts! Not to mention getting to play Banana Pancakes for a 2 year old is awesome! SHe has amazingly big brown eyes and curly black hair that just sits on her head in little loops. It isn't long enough to hang down yet.

But really now before I got sick I was still a busy little bee, living the party life still! I just can't escape it. People come over, we laugh together then they come back and drag me to the newest club and funny it is always VIP. What is it with VIP? I never pay for a thing.... Not that it is bad!!!

So after going out to the clubs in Rio the girls dragged me to the clubs here in Niteroi. I met Julia who always seems to add me to every party list when we go. She dragged me to a parivate party for this guy at an amazing out door club. Not that she had to pull me to go with her or anything. LOL. But this place was pretty cool. The five of us were in a section of the club with a POOL and our own private bar with free drinks all night. Now take in mind you can get a red bull and vadka at Vex for a dollar on Thursday nights (I think) here in Brazil it is the most exspensive drink on the menu! Dont ask me why but it is. So we had those and Smeirnoff Ice, and beer for free. The girls got wasted as usual lol. But I didn't understand the concept of this party for this guy. It was like her was running for president but for a college or high school. Not sure, but it was like a political party. Weird. But the club got packed and the music was hot, for awhile then I got board. The bass didn't fill me because it was too soft and the DJ was really bad. The girls were telling me to go up and spin for the club because they thought the music was bad too! HAHAHA. But no. I think we ended up getting home at 4AM, not too sure. We left a few girls there though, lol, they had rides home, *wink*. Nothing too crazy or anything but the free buzz was nice, so thank you to that guy, you rock! You have my vote!

Now this is when the fun starts! So Pamela told me about this gay party. I thought maybe it was something small. So I just put the same clothes on from the night before (reeking of smoke I didn't want to my other clothes to smell too) and went with Joana and Rafeal to this party. WHICH WASN'T A PARTY BUT A FUCKING GAY PARADE!!!!! HAHAHAHAHA! No really there were thousdans of people in the middle of the street and two giant buses with people dancing on the top while they played two different types of techno music! There were people dressed up and lights and food and everything. Right next to the beach too.

Now in Brazil being gay is not good. In America it is the same but people are more accepting, here not so much.So this is the one time they all come out and do what they want to do. I didn't know there were so many beautiful gay women in Brail, holy shit. I couldn't walk through the crowd for more then a few seconds without the girls touching me or pulling on my hair or even grabbing me and kissing me! I was sad that there weren't as many gay boys all dressed up in drag, I love that about the American boys. LOL. But again it isn't something they do here. Now out of all the people on the street I'm there on the sidewalk and Joana sees Tati! The girl from the night club!! Weird right? Well she just up and grabs me first off and makes out with me. Hello to you too! HAHA. We ended up spending the night together hanging out dancing and

on the beach. Her English is amazingly good and she travels everyhwere. One thing about Brazilian men is when they see two girls making out they want to kiss you too and they will stop at nothing to try. Wait that sounds like American men too. LOL. I almost had to punch this guy out...a few times. But if you know me well I'm down for a good fight! Moslt against men twice my size and three times as stupid as a normal goldfish... But hey. The one thing I love about Tati is she is always dancing. Never stops like me. Another is that she just loves to ask me to kiss her. Just looks at me and say KISS ME! I always smile at her and then she says no really KISS ME! So I do, I can't help it she is so demanding! You can only imagine how that night turned out. On to the next!

Shopping. Oh man the girls know how to shop and I hate to shop so I was the carier of the bags and the one that told them yes or know on things. Again the guy, which I dont mind....ever. Ture I found a shop that sold only vests but who the hell is going to pay 60-95 reals for a VEST?! Not me, so I'm going to a store next week where this lady will make some for me cheap if I get the fabric. I did how ever find a haulter vest for 20 and a white sundress with straps made out of this really great net like silk. I can't explain it. (I know I'm not a dress person but I had to get something my mom would like on me) and yes I found some shoes. The perfect pair of 20's flapper boots. The wide ankles with the flap over the top, in a sexy beige color. OK ok so they were 85 real but they are soooo worth it! Those with black pinstrip pants, a beige vest and a black fadora now that is hot!!

Ok have to tell this story in big font because... well because you'll see why.....While shopping some girl stops, and is staring at me in the weirdest way. Cute girl with a shoulder length hair cut and big brown eyes. Pretty cute girl in a general way of speaking. I'm used to peoplestaring at me for some reason or another so I looked at her and smiled and she damn near hits the floor!! Why? Not sure. She later walks up to Pamela and asks her........ "IS THAT MIA KUSHNER?" OMG WTF? Even in Brazil people think I'm Jenny from the L Word!!! COME ON!!!!! I will never escape this!

For those of you that dont know who Mia Kushner is I've uploaded a pic so you can see the damn difference that I guess other people dont see. But I wont lie it is pretty close.

Ok so before shopping on our way into Rio I got to see my favorite tiny tinies! The monkeys that I love at the Zoo. OMG they were running across the telephone wires and playing with each other. I wanted to grab one and just eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!!! HAHAHA. Also I saw a Domino's Pizza and a Subway. I got to the Jesus statue from a closer point of view, we are going to go see it next week. I think I will cry. I dont know why, I'm not religious but I know being in a place so high and beautiful over looking the city of Roi where you can hug the feet of Jesus just might make me cry. In a good way. But for now he scares me. Dont ask. I can't really remember what else we did that day. Other then the girls wearing me out I think we all went home and passed out. LOL. I know I was tired.

The next night, at least I think it was the next night, my days run together now, we went out to yet another party. LOL. This time it wasn't VIP but again it was free. This place was so cool. It was at a Country Club here in my city on top of this giant hill. The club was HUGE! Not as big as the Week but it could fit over 600 nicely. The music was good and the light show was sick. I ran into the pro fighter again who speaks english very well and is really big in Japan from what he said. The funny part is he was wearing a shirt with his own name on it....how lame. HAHA. Like he was stupid enough to have to look down and remember what his own name was. I'm surprised it wasn't written upside down for him HAHAHA!!! But in all honesty he's a great guy. At one point I was sitting outside the bathroom on yet another "I broke the seal"bathroom trips for the girls and these girls came up and asked it I was ok. I said yes and that I was waiting. They knew I was american and freaked out. Came right up and almost sat on me! Talking in the limited English they knew. I get this a lot by the way. LOL. Not that I mind these girls were cute. But there we were right on the dirt floor talking. They were begging me to hang out with them and I said that I had to wait for my friends. When Julia came out I pointed and I guess they were all friends and freaked out even more. The blond "LIKE OMG" type of freak out. Giddy and silly. Loves it!!! HAHAHA. (Shawn that was for you). Ended up hanging with a bunch of sweet girls that are still messaging me to hang out with them no matter how many times I saw I'm sick! HAHAHA. I just need one good shot of 151 and I'll be good! HAHA. Later that night I made nice with the three DJ's and hung out with them. I needed a small break from the crowd. I just wanted to feel the music for awhile. The guys were sick and let me play around and learn the system for corresponding the light show with the beat of the music! SICKNESS! I love it. I think we got home that night at 630 in the morning, again I had to drive because the girls just get so wasted!!! LOL.

The next moring we slept in and later a lady came over and......cut my hair. (Stay tuned for that one!!!) But since then Joana and I have been sick. I think she's been sick longer and fighting it but now we are just so tired that we sleep all day. The mom is wonderful and takes care of me, she even got me antibiotics! Awesomeness!! Cant think of anything else really. A guy comes over and helps me learn Spanish songs on the guitar, I drink a lot of strawberry tea and have to go to the bathroom all day long because of it, I eat amazing food (something new everyday), I watch it rain sometimes, or I sit and listen to music on my ipod sitting on the roof. So far. I'm happy to say the work is coming soon. I have two photoshoots set up next week in Rio and Buzios one of the most amazing beaches in Brazil. So if the weather is nice it's on!!! WOOHOO! I'm uploading a video of my brother in a boxing outfit, when you see it you will die! This is what we do when we are home alone!! HAHAHA! I love this kid soooo much!

So I'm going back to hang with family. I've already had more then enough food stuffed down my face to last me for a few days and still they keep wanting to feed me. I think I really am sick on food right now, ug. Also the baby is calling for me. We've already done the airplane thing where I toss her up and down in circles and she screams and laughs. I'm drunk on the laughter of a baby. The pureness of it fills my soul in the deepest innocence that I can't help but smile and feel the joy of it myself. That and she's pulling at the strings of my guitar. I got her on video playing with me I have to upload that too!
So I hope all is well for everyone that stops by and reads this. I miss you all but am having an amazing time so dont worry I'm not home sick. HAHA. Much love!

The Week and the box....

2008-07-05T12:12:00.000-07:00

The rain had left the city with the scent of washed away muck. The damp smell that clings to the streets where it doesn't smell good but it doesn't smell bad either. I could smell the scent of shampoo and perfume coming from the bathroom where the girls were getting ready. Laughing and talking so fast I could only pick up a few words here and there. But when they came out they looked beautiful, as always. I snuck in after them and put up my favorite pair of old naturally torn Guess jeans, chain link belt, knee high boots, and the new vest I got in downtown Rio with the essential accessories (gloves, rings, cross necklace, studded braclet, the thick rocker eye shadow, Very Sexy lipstick and the scent of Paris Hilton). When I came out the girls were ready and we hopped into the car and drove in the warm night air to Rio. Over the giant bridge where the smell of sea water blended with the nasty smell of fumes from the cars. Down into the lights and through the traffic we found ourselfs early at a night club called "The Week". The temptation of beers at the bar down the street drove us to spend two hours drinking and laughing finishing 9 tall beers between us four. The bar had been crowded with older men smoking pipes while they watched the younger generation make their way into the club. You could hear the bass from down the block and feel the buzz of naughty coming from the club goers. When we had said it was our last beer and meant it this time we chugged the last bit and walked down the street. Oh the thrill of the happy buzz I had. Sitting on my stool with the biggest smile on my face. I couldn't stop smiling, but when I think of "her" I never can. Again I could only imagine the joy I'd feel if she was with me, drinking and laughing with us. The sweetness of that laugh still rings in my ears. My own random bursts of laughter are known as my "happy thoughts" to the girls. They know who I'm thinking about and can't help but laugh with me. I'm sure the laughter being so loud this time was caused by the beer and good company. But on we walked into the club, the vibrations flowing through your feet and the thumping in your chest, a feeling you can't hate or describe, but it makes one feel the energy of the club and puts you in the mood. It almost screams sex to me. The techno was killer. The on going and ever changing beats thrown out to the vast people by three different DJ's in a club that could hold and maybe was holding at least 600 or more. The neon lights flashed in every direction possible and the smoke machines would randomly fog up a section of the room, again calling for sex on the dance floor. The buzz had gotten to me and I felt the urge to dance and dance hard. The pure thrill of knowing I could do what I wanted and never hear about it later through small town rumors was the only reason that the four foot by four foot box in the middle of the dance floor called to me. Oddly I think I really even heard it call my name. As soon as I was above the crowd I blocked out the cheers and the flashing of pictures and just danced my heart out. Danced because life is so much sweeter, no so desirable, with dance. The pounding of bass gave strong vibration through my body, numbing my feet and legs in the greatest way, giving me no reason to really stop. I looked around at one point and was happy to see I wasn't the only one on the boxes. There were girls pumping and shaking the sexiest parts they offered for the pleasure of the crowd. But when I felt someone next to me I froze, thinking it was a security guard trying to pull me down. Before I knew it I was turned around by a four foot 9 pixie of a girl with beautiful shoulders and a tat between her small but lovely breasts. She grabbed my face and kissed me. The thought of "her" came into mind. I blocked out the girl and closed my eyes seeing only her face, the only one I wanted to see. Again hearing the ringing of her laugh and seeing her eyes smile at me from afar. Being able to enjoy the kiss more with the thought of kissing someone else. My Perfect Drug, My Addiction. True I enjoyed the kiss for what it was worth. I could hear the crowd, being a mix of gay and straight only because the club was a gay club every night but fridays. Again the flashing of lights behind my eyelids and then she jumped off and left me standing alone and still frozen. I smiled as I watched her walk off, and then I could feel the beat again and dance, my friend and happy companion joined me again on the box. Later when I ended up on the ground now shorter then the crowd I found her. Her dance was smooth, the transitioning of beats, oh like having sex on the dance floor (which some people think is wrong when it is just about dancing not sex at all). I heard her voice ask me to kiss her with the sweetness of Brazil on her tongue, again asking me in english, so I did. The forwardness of women excites me. Ask for it, demand it, beg for it and you kill me inside. So she did several times that night. Who would I be to say no? Deni the softness of a woman? The fingers on my skin or mine on theirs. The swaying hips and back muscles when I run my hands down them, pulling them closer to give them what they want. Why say no, ever? Why did I ever stop saying no. To be back in this life where I can taste whom ever, be with whom ever, and please whom ever I want (women of coarse) has been something I've denied myself for so long. But getting back into it, easy and smooth as silk. And no to that one person, I dont scream sex, I reek of it. *Wink* But again only the thoughts of "her" and her body came to mind that night even in the mists of my play time, that body of hers, my PFOS was the only thing I really wanted to touch. To see the chills I give her when I do. To hear the sweet moans when I kiss her right, always biting softly. A kiss I never share when I'm not with her, our kiss... The end of the night came and went, the next thing I knew I had numbers in my pocket and too many cards to count from the club. I was soon in the back seat with two girls passed out on me. Giving me the joy of playing with long hair smelling of smoke and frilly shampoo while the heavy sleeping breaths kept me smiling. Again the dominance in me comes out in straight women, a need to protect them, be the only man they'll ever need. Then I was driving through the darkened streets of Nitoroi, the tropical tress high lighted by the small street lamps. Going through red lights in the dark and finally pulling in to the mansion I call home while a sleeping Joana was curled up on the back seat. I put her to bed and woke up this morning to laugh at the spread of both our clothes all over the floor and the room smelling of a perfect girls night out.....

Beach fun and soccer?

2008-07-03T17:47:00.000-07:00

Now what an interesting few days its been. Wait, few as in how many? I don't even know what day it is anymore. LOL, awesome!! I will say this after that weekend I hung by the pool at Joana's house, listened to Brazilian rock, read my book, ate chocolate, and watched Victor (her little brother) jump off the second story into the pool and then join me in lighting fireworks. Which didn't work and exploded in our faces (I was lucky to have my eyes behind my camera because the pieces that hit my legs hurt like a bitch!) We got it on film, again with the youtube! Later that day we went back to the mall and I did some shopping, mostly for fun snacks I've never had and that was about it.

As for the interesting few days it begins with Joana and I going to town on a bus. That was fun and scary. LOL. But once we got to town turns out she had heard me say that I wanted to get my toes done again and made a pedi apt!! She is too cute. I'm so glad too, because it was only $12 bucks with tip!! Now my feet look pretty dang cute. It is one of the only girly things I do and I promised myself to do more.

So I did and now I have a frenchy on my little toes. *Note:To my PFOS I would love for you to rub my feet if you let me rub yours back! They are so cute and girly!!! I know you will like it and I want to spoil you rotten! Then Joana and I got on a giant ferry and I met up with a guy from France and had a nice coversation in English, French, and Portugease since I forgot a lot of words in all different languges and he didn't know much English. LOL. The boat ride was so cool, the view was beautiful!! So off we went into Down Town Rio and did some awesome shopping. I bought so much stuff it wasn't even funny and it added up to about $100 in real, or $62 dollars! Fuck yes! We took a little walk in to the Parliment (my dad would be so proud) and then to the church. I have some crazy pics that would go great as screen savers they are so cool. I was stoked to get a lot of cheap jewerly and a sick little vest that is so rocker it kills me! Fat rings, some made from coconut, some silver, a cross neck lace and yes a tiny tiny tiny thong bikini! Hotness. So that was one full day and my feet are still killing me!!

I was so excited when Joana said she got abunch of girls together and that we were going to the beach. Hot girls and the beach. I'm so down! Plus I got to see my beautiful curly haired girl again. She is too cute. Her brother is a male model in New York and I guess is pretty big. I'll have to look him up. Picked up the girls all of them in thongs, and headed to an amazing beach. The mtn on the side broke for killer surf, the waves were swelling perfectly and the sand was so interesting I sat and looked at it for about 20mins. As if I was on shrooms. You'd have to be there I think. Then thinking to myself..... nah the water will be cold..... I headed to the waves and to my utter surprise the water was warm and me being a little fish I got in and spent about two hours in the water. I freaked the girls out, playing in the giant waves and getting too close to the break on the mtn. Then the ONLY guy I find attractive on the beach and ended up talking with was a pro fighter.... lol. I really don't know where these people come from. The girls were watching him from afar and I went right up and said hello. It isn't like getting scared to talk to some famous person in America like Johnny Depp. To me he was just a guy. A very hot guy. I dont remember the last time I was really attracted to a man. Maybe it was because he looked dumb and I go for (or did) the guys I can minipulate. Sorry guys... LOL. So yah. I spent hours in the water then getting out took my top off and laughed when everyone on the beach was staring. Turns out it is something you can do but people just dont do it often. My beach experience is all France and topless. I hate tan lies!! Oh well guys you'll have to deal because my boobs have to breath!! HAHA. Not much after that, oh unless you count the fact I got a gig at the Macarana Finals for soccer! $100bucks to dance around with a bunch of girls in cheerleading outfits (I was in heaven thinking about it)! So we left the beach and took everyone home so we could get ready.

I want to add here that my hair was going to be chopped off before I got here and I ended up not doing it because of photshoots I have planned over here. Now I regret it. My hair is so curly in this weather it is driving me nuts!! Yes it looks cute until I dont have enough time to straighten it!! The girls love it so ok I guess it is fine over here but I'm cutting it ASAP! Jenn baby get ready for the hawk with pink streaks I know you've been dieing to get your hands on me. I think the PlayBoy bunnies will approve don't you? Love you, miss you!

Jumping in the car we grabbed the girls and headed to the game. This thing was huge and packed! People with flags and hats and everything. Like the superbowl kind of thing. Men being drunk losers in the streets waving flags at people in cars. The girls yelling at them saying that they don't speak portugease! LOL. That was funny!

When we parked, walked for days and found our gate we were escorted to a building where we were going to be given our oufits. I walk in to find 20 of the sexiest girls already waiting. And since we were somewhat late we didn't get outfits. SAD!!! But not that sad. Because they felt so bad for us and told them we wanted to stay and watch the game. So BAM! VIP PASSES!! *Takes a bow*

The party room was awesome! Private DJ and thanks to the interning I walked over, talked with the DJ and he handed over his shit and let me spin for awhile!!! Benny Benassi you are a God thank you for working with every type of Brazilian music!! LOL. So the dance floor rocked, lights everywhere, private bar where again I couldn't help myself hung out practicing my flare with them! *Leaving LA seems to have been the better idea when wanting to learn the coolest shit!! DJ, and bartending all in one night* They had a sport channel set up down the hall because of all the famous people walking around (I didn't know) for interviewing and ALL THE FOOD! *Note: I am making a post for all the crazy food so stay tuned for that!! They had hotdogs with everything you could ever want on them, Crepes, some of them meat filled which is very Brazilian, and fondue! Yah grapes, strawberries, bananas, pineapple, etc. Sad part was they weren't serving alcohol. But that never stops me. I found a beer stand and we all got drinks, then after I talked with the bar tenders and they pulled out the hard stuff and made us some kick ass shit!!!! Oh beer and a good game, I was missing home football starts sooner then you think!! Maybe I'll fly out to Hawaii with Kris for the Pro Bowl.... wonder how much that would be? LOL. Not to mention 11 hours tog et here so I'm guessing a 16 plus hour flight to Hawaii!!! HAHAHA....

After partying it up before the game we headed to a section set aside for us. Um like a veiw of the whole friggin field and private vendors that brought us free snacks (popcorn, air rice things, and even icecream!) the whole time. The game was sick! I dont understand much of soccer but just watching it was cool. I sat next to a really nice lady that spoke English and right in the middle of us talking a giant camera crew comes up and starts taking pics of her! I WAS LIKE WTF?! Yep again a famous actress who had just had a baby and this was her first big night out. She was too cute, hoping they didn't get overtime because she wanted to get home to her little one! So I moved and hung with the girls, then found my way to a nice spot where this guy was being really nice to me and helping me see. Joana comes up a little later and her jaw is on the floor. Didnt know why because then all of a sudden he was wanting to make out and take me home with him.

Yes in my drunken state I did and he was a very BAD kisser! Not like the sexy bartender. LOL. You get drinks in me and I tend to like making out with boys, because sober they touch me and get slapped!!! LOL. *Note: I really have got to stop making out with boys when I really dont like it. The few (and I mean few. I'm counting 5 now since I've been single and one was gay, girls on the other hand, dont get me started...) I've kissed had been buzzed little moments and were horrible! LOL. I can't say that about the girls. This is to the ladies in Vegas. My semi drunk and sober nights. At any point in time if you ever want to drag me to a strip club again and take advantage of me I'm down. I loved having the smell of sexy women on my pillows the next morning!! You laides were worth it!! So even though he was a bad kisser I found out why the girls kept looking at me funny. I had made out with one of the most popular teen actors in Brazil!! AHHHH this is driving me crazy! He is on this soap opera like show for teens and Joana almost shit herself to put it bluntly!! LOL. I ended up going home with him (not like that) and was going to hang with him at the set today but woke up and was in Iponima and my feet really hurt from walking so much! So I wanted out of there ASAP. Iponima is like an hour from Joana's house and so I had to call Andrea to get me.

Thank the lord he is a sweet heart and did. Then he took me to the beaches, and out to lunch and the helped me get on a van back to Rio. The luch was awesome by the way.... But you know me. My camera had died the night before at the party so I wasn't able to take any pictures. But I will add that it was also cloudy (but warm) and I will be going back soon. So I've been catching up on emails and whatnot the rest of the day. It is late now but I can't go to sleep because again the little brother has fallen asleep in my spot and because he is sleeping with his nephew who is 3 I wont wake them. Also it is raining like a MOFO here. It is the coolest thing ever. It scared me half to death at first because I thought the roof was caving in. Then there was thinder and lightening and only rainy days can put me in the perfect mood. So back to my emails I guess and Youtube!

So this link is to a video from the beach! Enjoy!! *wink wink*

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zvgj8DFh1JI

This is a link to a video of me DJing at the club. It was when we first got there and I could mess around. But later it got crazy!! I even got a card from a guy that wants me to do an event in Sao Paulo... crazy huh?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=STkDyL4_GfQ

The Engagement Weekend

2008-06-30T18:56:00.000-07:00

Ok so again I didn't get any sleep, not because anything happened to keep me up (dirty minds), we just had to get up early the next morning. Or rather afternoon I should say. LOL. The night before I was invited to an engagement party (I KNOW RIGHT?) Here less then 24 hours and I'm being invited to parties! Sweetness! This means good food!!!! Around 1:30, after packing and a good shower I crammed into the small car with the mom, dad, and Joana. Then as if we didn't have enough room we picked up Joana's boyfriend (see told you nothing happened.... I know it hasn't stopped me before, but still *wink*) and drove for two and half hours to a place called Macuco, so small you cant find it on a map! True we did stop once and I got a kick out of using the bathroom only to find a wall of sexy undies in there if you wanted to buy them. '(Its like fuck sex we are going back to enjoying forplay!! Love it.) *Note: Make list of odd things about Brazil. We also stopped for awhile to do some things for the mom in a small town that you could tell was very poor. But it was still beautiful. The pic is of a yard "gnome" which is really a naked woman for your front lawn....

So I passed out in the car as soon as it got dark, it is winter so around 530pm the sun went down. I missed the curvy road trip and was awaken by a loud bunch of Brazilian people. It was about 8 or so I'm guessing but my time clock is very wrong here. But I opened the door and was greeted by by kisses from a large and wonderful family and a nice cold beer. Oh yes and a shot of this special alcohol that only Brazilian people can make because it comes from a nut or fucking something that is only here in Brazil. Whatever. It was good, the boys were impressed I didn't need a chaser, never do. Then there was a shit load of bread, butter, and FANTASTIC cheese shoved down my tube! LOL. The more I tired to say no the more food I got. But they gave me just enough to make my tummy happy and the jet lag to really kick in I guess. Because I said NO to going out! Not that there is anywhere to go because it is a farming town, but I still said no. I don't think this counts as stopping the party only because I drank and had a few shots before I called it quits and went to bed.

So guess what I woke up to that morning? Hell yah a fucking cock!! What else? LOL. Yep I was the last person in bed still living the rockstar life and yet when I came out there was food on the table. More butter, bread, cheese, tea, coffee, fruit, etc. And they were starting to cook for the party that night. So to my utter enjoyment they pulled in a WHOLE pig like in Hawaii and stuffed a potato in its mouth and tried to scare me with it. HAHA...HA. Yah what do I do? I go up and start playing with the dead thing's nose, poking it and making my ~eeeeeeeeeee sound. Basicly a way of me calling the about to be cooked pig cute! He was.

And at this point I would like to add I LOVE MY FUCKING CAMERA!!! Thanks to the fucker who broke in and stole my camera, over 300 in cash and my dirty panties (yes that is what I said) I was able to get a new cannon and it takes amazing pics. This pig pic would be one of many that my friend Phil Holland would enjoy. I actually thought that I would have loved to have him around this weekend for the reason of what an amazing photshoot it would be.

Anyway. So they were cutting meat, dicing veggies, brewing, stewing, boiling, chopping, sauteing, etc., all this food and I had yet to meet all the family! They were great. The bride was 18 and the groom.....26 but hell she's legeal and to die for!! The cousins were a blast. I hung with them. Beers and bbq are kinda my thing. One guy looked like Zane, odd we got along great....lol. Not much english but they loved teaching me every food word they could. Now I know how to say the most random things.... lol. But that is what we did all day. Cooked, ate, drank, until they asked if I wanted to see the farm! OHHH YES I DOOOO OOOOOO!!

When I said yes they gave me no time to go back, tossed me in the car in my pj's and we drove through the small and poor city. Now when you think famr you think cows and pigs, well they had these things, but um, in the middle of the tropics? LOL. That's right we drove up into the mtns that looked like driving through Santa Cruz and then BAM a farm. Complete with milking machines and about 12 different kinds of friut tress. From what I got the town is like a small town in the south. There are families that have been there for generations. Joana's is one of the oldest families they have.

They are the ones that supply Rio and most of Brazil with milk products! TOO COOL! I was given the grand tour through fruit trees, flowering trees (seeing my favorite flower growing wild!) go to see the animals, pet baby cows and walk through the milking process.
I was blown away, it was so amazing. They even had an old run down building that I guess was slave housing before the got rid of slavery. Now they are re doing it so they can move the family there. They are getting older and want life to be easy on them. Sweet.... So I really can't tell you how cool a 2 hour tour was, but I loved it!!!! I got a bushca (a tree sponge, looks like a sea sponge and for the same thing) and we were tempted to eat the wild mushrooms before the wedding. We didn't..... sad...... it would have been a trip for me! HAHAHAHA.

When we got back to the house THEY WERE STILL EATING!!! Now it was a late lunch and there was so much food, not even the 32 people there could finish everything. But we tried! *Note: Make food post! LOL. Then I changed and hung out at the BBQ and played with all the animals. I think animals like me because every where I go they follow me around!! LOL!

After we had full tummies we got ready for the party. It was 830 when we got there and it didn't start till 930 and we didn't eat until 1045!!! It was amazing! 50+ people at a tiny open reception and it was warm. The best sweet wine I've had yet and the food, ok ok ok, I know you get it! But you should have been there!!! We had about a 5 corse meal and then the groom got up and asked his bride to marry her again. It is a tradition to ask the father (her's had passed so he asked the grandfather and uncle) if he can have her hand in marriage again for the family. So Joana translated for me and some sweet and wonderful things were said. The family took turns speaking then they put rings on and we ate dessert! SO MUCH CHOCOLATE! It took up three tables! Again more pics to show you! My camera had run out of battery by that time and I used the iphone instead! Thank god for that. I loved how I was in a little top and light jacket and everyone else was in snow jackets because they thought that 60 degrees is too cold!!! LOL! I love winter here!

When we got home I passed out. I think. We had been drinking and the last thing I want to remember (I remember everything) is when this guy was hitting on me big time. Saying he couldn't believe I wasn't interested in him. His cousin's weremaking fun of him and to prove that I didn't like him I kissed the Brazilian version of George Clooney! He was about 45 and hot!! LOL. That was amazing because all the women in the family were clapping for us! HAHAHA. After that the guy got pissed off and left for another table. It took him so long to get to my table to begin with. He had his mom ask if he could sit with me. Big story but I don't want to remember. LOL. So I'm guessing I passed out.

Woke up the next morning and had a small breakfast even though I was stillfull from last night. Hung out with the boys again then passed out for 4 hours again, woke up and ate lunch (BBQ!!!!) and then we went around to the other families' houses so we could see them. And to another farm where I got to see baby pigs and pet baby cows too!! TOO FUN!

After the drive home I got in the shower and Joana took me to the mall. It was fun to see everything that we have in America there, but not fun seeing that a pair of All Stars is like 120 real, which means half of that American dollars. Everything is soooomuch here it isn't even funny! I paid 4 real for a double cheeseburger at McDonalds!!! That is how bad it is. A big mac is 12 and meals are even more depending on what you get! So the point of us going to the mall was to see... SEX AND THE CITY!!! Which was soooo good and cooler because it had subtiltles for everyone else.nAll the movies and tv shows here do so I can watch whatever I want most of the time. But I don't. I'm never home! LOL! So after the movie we went home, ate and fell asleep. It was a very long weekend!!! If I left anything out I'll have to go back and update but really it was a long weekend!

Just a note: Only you....

2008-06-30T17:42:00.000-07:00

So for all you dirty minds that thought I wasn't getting any sleep because of well, you know, then shame on you! At the same time I know you wouldn't put it past me with my current rep with the ladies. But really I'm not ly'n when I say I'm really not a player.... lol ... ok not a big one! HAHA. Tried to fight those demons and it didn't work. I just love to love. So I guess the real me is back! Watch out I've been hiding for too long!! But don't get me wrong when I say at the moment I've got a small tug on my heart. I still can't let this one go.

She haunts me. I see her when I sleep. I hear her voice. I hear her laugh. It kills me sometimes. But day by day I know it will be ok again. Yet the thought of touching her, running my fingers through her short brown hair, like feathers excites me. Feeling that "God save me" soft skin every where I can. The wild bark color of her skin, the sexy tats that add just enough personality to the already attractive amount of it. Her figure that I wish I could touch now still. Those perfect curves drive me crazy. Girl you know I love them. That figure and those hands and legs. You drive me crazy still. Your kiss is the sweetest yet. When you touch me you're so careful it makes me smile. I love the way you let me be dominate and hold you tight, pull you close in my arms, take your breath away. But just know even with all the other amazing things we do, and they are amazing *wink* I only need to look in your eyes. The eyes that smile at me even when your not. The deepness of brown and honey and that sexy wink of yours. Girl you kill me!! Yes all I need is your eyes. True the sound of us together laughing fills me with butterflies and I can't help but smile, or the look you give me when you don't think I'm watching, or that smile. That soft kiss me smile. Hell I need you, all of you. In my buzzing state of mind when I'm out drinking with friends I feel you next to me and I feel relaxed thinking of meeting your large family and just sitting with them being fully excepted for who we are. Hearing "pass the girl a beer and some meat on the BBQ" is the perfect sound at the moment. The perfect vision is your mouth, that tempting ring that I will never stop biting on because of the way you sound when I do. If you read this, maybe you might, then know that I miss you. That I'd love to see where this can go if I come back. But be happy until that point. Just the thought of you keeps me content. Keeps me at bay, but no promises girl. Just do what you gotta do and so will I. But your name is in my mind more then I'd like and your my favorite addiction...

So to my ladies, ahhhh you've got competition! LOL! No J/K! No, I want to thank you for being you. For letting me kiss you, or touch you, dance with you or just be with you at the time. For the sweet nights where I hope I did you right and said what you wanted to hear, gave you what you wanted of me and maybe we can venture that way again but at the moment I've got this thing and I really need another... fix. I know only my girls will understand this if they read it, to everyone else I'm really not a player, I love em when they want love and I let em go when they need to be... nothing more, nothing less. *Wink*

(I know my gay boys are shaking their heads at me... You love me and you know it!!! Kisses*)

Day One

2008-06-29T14:18:00.001-07:00

*Note: I know I'm a few days late but take in mind I've had an interesting time with no internet to jot down notes. Also I wanted to be somewhat rested so I could write more in the way I know I can. Hopefully with wit and a little more brains. Names and places included this time. I would love to do a timeline but I don't really no what time it is ever!! I also want to add pics and videos which I uploaded a program I hope works from here to do that!! Oh and the coin toss video is on this post... I couldn't get it to go away... Enjoy!

So to start off day one remember that I still have yet to sleep and it was 3 days ago so I hope I don't leave anything out!

I got off the plane (the very stuffy, cramped, feel like you've caught every cold possible plane) and walked into a giant terminal and walked about 20feet before standing in a line for American's and "others" not from Brazil for about 30 minutes. I did however meet Victoria (love that name). She was a beautiful "book worm" Asian girl who is here for volenteer work. We talked about the diseases floating around through the bugs here. Take in mind we didn't get any shots because the Embassy told us we didn't need to. So we were a little freaked out. But we traded emails anyway and told eachother if anyone of us catches something we'll call eachother mom's for help..... not like they can do much. After getting through I stopped to exchange money ( LOVE THAT I'M RICH OVER HERE!!! MAUHAHAHAHAHA *evil laugh*) and I met Scott a fighter that recruits fighters to bring back to the states. I guess I'm going to a kick ass fight while I'm here, don't hate!! So after getting bout another 80 cents per dollar I waited for my fucking bag for about 45 minutes!!! But when the only white bag with stars all over it popped out I could relax, alittle, I still had to find my ride.... *Note: For aslong as I'm staying I had a very small bag compared to other people. I guess I pack light. It's the nomad in me.

Coming out of the gate thank God there was Joana!!! My beautiful Brazilian girl. Oh I love her. She has the most amazing figure that she hates. Dark skin, brown eyes, long brown hair, a lovely butterfly laugh and an ass I would kill for!! A few kisses and we were on our way! I guess I got off at the same time as a famous soccer team so the airport was packed!!! Saw the news reel later that day! We drove from Rio De Janeiro to Niteroi where Joana lives. I can't tell you how amazing the drive over the giant bridge was. I could see huge battle ships in the bay and the other far off cities surrounded by mtns. Or after we got off the bridge how her town had large islands covered in lights all over it sitting near the ocean beach. The smells made my mouth water. But again the thought of food kills me anyway!

Now before I get to Joana's house let me tell you how crazy Rio is already. They have motels were people go for a night to have sex. Not like the Ranch but you bring your mate to have sex for a night then leave with then they next morning. They have themed rooms and will card you if you look under 18! OK now you know....

I've been lucky enough to be blessed in life I think. So many amazing things have happened in my life and this topped the cake. I was a little worried about the town and the safty I'd be in when I got here but Joana's mom is a lawyer and her dad owns a factory and her house, well, she's loaded I guess because I'm staying in a fucking mansion!!! Pool included. Her family (mom, step dad, two brothers "older one very cute", and cat who's blind) is amazingly nice and very welcoming. Not much English but were pleased at my Portuguese! Hard language topick up but I'm getting it! *Note: Will upload pics of her house.

So I got to the house and took a shower, it had been awhile.... lol. Then we went out to eat! This always sounds good to me. But Joana my love knows me well enough that she took me to a buffet! OMG! I can not tell you how fucktastic this place was. A buffet full of food I've never had AND everything I have. Best part was I could get any type of sushi I wanted! This would be the third day in a row! But not only that Iamazed Joana by loading myplate with 6 different salads,7 pieces of sushi, every type of thing I've never seen before and then sat down to dig in. BUT!!!! There are men that walk around with fresh meat on sticks just cooked and they go around asking if you want any. You can say yes or no with a little card. Now I love meat so I had a seprate plate with 16 different meats on it. Yes I ate them all and those would include everything from CHICKE HEARTS TO OSTRAGE!!! I FUCKING LVE BRAZIL!!! I also came to find they don't like anything SPICEY!!! I WANT TO DIE NOW!!!! I've lived and lived well!

So after that I was due for a nap, passing out on the car ride home which was 10 minutes away. HAHA. So I got my small nap. When I say small I mean about 2 hours if that. Then I was ready to go out and party. ALWAYS!!! So Joana and I got dressed up and went to pick up her friends Ranata and Minuel who are both sexy as hell. Minuela more because she has amazingly curly blond locks. But both are very seductive and are teases I will add... Damn them. Then we went to a bar and waited for the club toopen. While we were there I had the pleasure of finding out there is a Cooley Jackson in all places! This guy we watched from a distance as he danced, but worse through his sweaty head all over, spraying people on the dance floor. To a point where I was turned around and I thought it was raining!!! YUCK!!

When the club opened (Democrates) the 9 player band started up (Anjos de Lua) and I was in the mists of the Samba. A dance I will learn to get before I leave here. The most amazing part is the women dancing together. The pure sexiness of them throwning each other over the floor almost killed me. But it did, when I lived in France as well. Hell it does it to me anywhere but my three things in life are (Music, Dance and Food) in that order and my life is perfect!!

So I was about 4 beers down (smaller then America) and being pulled around by rnadom beautiful girls. I did get to salsa once or twice and get in a few good claps from the crowd and a kiss on the cheek from a very flushed Brazilian woman. Point goes to me!! HAHA! But after that many beers and dancing we needed food, so the girls ordered some sort of sausage covered in this powder like stuff that looks like cream of wheat. But tastes amazing! No really it was amazing. More dancing and non stop beer for 4 more hours and I was ready to eat again. So I go out by myself and find a little joint that serves me a giant burger for 3 bucks!! But the best part: Ham, hamburger, bacon, egg, corn, peas, and potatoes all inbetween the bun! I'M IN HEAVEN!!!

The girls found me scarfing down on the side of the road chatting with the vendors and took me in the car. 6girls crammed into a 4 person car, things are bound to happen. Imust say the video I am going to upload is too funny and a must see! Least to say we made it home, more or less. My first thought was jumping in the pool but at 3 am I didn't think it would be a good idea, seeing as naked was my only option... not that it stops me.... So we went upstairs and Joana and I passed out in the same bed. Firstbit of sleep I thought I was going to get.... didn't happen.....lol. Maybe I should add Sleep to my list but you can sleep when you're dead!!!

Hello Brazil!!!

2008-06-27T08:48:00.000-07:00

So hello everyone! Oh man it has been an interesting week, almost an interesting month I should say. Bringing the party back from Vegas wasn't a great idea but it worked for me!!!

Anyway. I had been up for the last two days (I have friends to vouge for me), and I mean up, no sleep and always doing something. Packing, working two jobs, doing work online, making sure everything was perfect before I left. Least to say I'm here and there are a few more things I could have done! But being up for two days (sorry to the friends I bothered in those 36 hours and thanks to the friends who helped me out!) wasn't very good on the ride to Sac.

Robbie, his friends and I crammed into the back of his Toyota Tacoma at 5:30 AM and headed out of town. We had planned on spending the whole day in Sac so we left early. On the drive over the hill we pulled out some pretty rocking mustaches and aviators and impressed some gas station people with our po po good looks! The pics are pretty funny. After just hanging in Sac (getting some time in to play a "Ukalali" which I'm getting better at thanks to the guitar lessons) we went to this AMAZING SUSHI PLACE! Now anyone that knows me, knows how much I like food. OK how much i LOVE food. If you been lucky enough to see the "happy food shake" you will be happy to find my food was having a good time in my belly from shaking too much. *Note: It seems as if I've been a bottemless pit for the last week.*

Then I was taken to the Amtrak to hop on a nice sunset train ride to SF. Little did I know that the train was going to be right next to the water and a beach, setting sunset, view on a train was so far the high light of my trip (that and the coin tossing/YouTube video for that one!) Took a trip to the coffee cart got some hot tea thinking when I got to SF I could hit the sack and thiat would help me sleep. After that a nice bus ride from Emeryville to the Bart I found that my friend had a last minute gig in LA and least to say ditched me!! Victor you rock my socks off!!! LOL. So no sleep just yet.....

But again knowing me, you know that improvising is my big thing, which I do a lot lately! LOL. So sitting at the Bart trying to get a hold of other friends and even a photographer I worked with I was currently stranded. Until PABLO!!

Well "P" as he likes to be called, said that his mom raised him right and good things happen to people who do good things (I was in love with a very large black man now!!!) if you understand that is how I live my life then it makes sense why I would hehehe. So he told me to come party with him and his friend and yes I went. I know this freaks most people out, ok all people out, but I just get feelings about people and his was good. TURNS OUT...... his cousin is a football player for the Oakland Raiders, I think Edward Thomas is his name, #55! HOW DO I MEET ALL THESE PEOPLE?!!! (When I say this it is because since my return home I've met so many people that would blow you away with either who they are or the connections they have, and I love them for them, all of them are great people!! So again thank you to those people for showing me the most amazing times of my life!!!)

So we went to his place/loft in Jack London Square to what seemed like the top floor of this beautiful apartment building. This place was beautiful! The entrance had leather, red paint, beautiful flooring and decor. I was treated to wine and a good football game before we headed to this cop bar called the Warehouse a few blocks away. Nice place and very safe. The fact I was drinking and dancing with cops was the best part!!! After still being up now going on 48 hours we went to back to P's place late, I got 3 hours sleep then was off to the Bart, spent an hour at a local coffee shop flirting through text messages (hehehe) and at the Embassy getting my visa after that. Got on the Bart back to the airport and off to Miami.

The 5 hour plane ride was nice, the views were perfect. I loved seeing the red rocks of Utah and the dips and cracks of the canyons in Colorado. The farming in the mid west and the almost tropical views of the South. And the welcome from the City of Sex was perfect. Hot weather and the most beautiful girls ever!! Not to mention almost all of the ones I met were gay. That was AMAZING! *Note: Party in Miami with those girls when I visit Don...* Then after a 3 hour layover off to the plane for Brazil!!!!

I wont lie at this point I can't remeber how long I've been up and couldn't sleep very well on the plane over. The views were amazing out the window though. I did notice that America's view is very perfect, with lines and direct seperations compared to the hills and mtns of Brazil. The moon from a plane is great too. Waking up to the sun and the amazing rain clouds bundeling up under the jet engines over this beautiful country was fantastic!!! I have some great pics of that!!!

So after 8 hours on a plane I was finally in Brazil.... still not much sleep.....fun.